Wednesday, November 01, 2006

The First Night of the NBA Season... and This Blog!

Now if you've been geeked for the return of the N, B, and A like I have, I really feel like we should have a hard nipple contest. Seriously. You think you're excited, you have to feel these straight-up "cut like a Hattori Hanzo sword" nips on me right now. I ain't playin'. They will slice your ass up!

And that's some realness right there.

So, what the frag am I doing right now other than thinking that the Miami Heat looked uglier than a sweaty Patrick Ewing? Well, honestly, I'm bored. That friggin' opening game put me to sleep. I mean, unless I was a Bulls fan, I don't think I really give two shiznizzles about the game and can't wait to sees me some Steve Nash... no, I'm no Canadian or Nelly Furtado, but the dude is good and a joy to watch... in a totally hetero way, of course.

But, let me get back to the Heat. Look how pathetic they look on the bench over to the right. They look like they're waiting for Madonna to come along and adopt them out of their situation, which ended up being a situation that saw the Bulls 108 and the Heat three whole points away from a sexual position. But, you know what? They got into a sexual position anyway - the bend over.

Anyway, I am loving this Suns/Lakers game right now. The Suns were running like white chicks in horror movies and it looked like they were going to dash away with the win, but the Lakers did and thought like Jason - "Go ahead, biznitch... keep running. My 'janitor clothes and hockey mask wearing' ass will be catching up to yours."

And at the start of the fourth quarter, the Los Angeles Voorhees have. And Lamar Odom has been the ubiqitous machete.

But. what up with Vladimir Radmanovic? With the way his hair looks, I can't decide if he's more Richard Marx or Arthur Fonzarelli when he first wakes up? Oh, the mysteries of life. But, I'm thinking if that on the cusp mullet becomes popular in L.A., someone is going to have to represent the Jheri curl. Can someone call A.C. Green? That dude needs to come out of retirement.

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